#CoronaChronicles #3 Being a Working Mommy
So clearly finding yourself among the never-finishing-the-never-ending-to-do-lists-working-mommy makes you question your skills and efficiency every waking moment of the day!
Thanks to #SocialDistancing i.e. #ForcedHomeArrest, you stare at your laptop or glare at the floor (or the sink!) - And there's ONLY one constant - There's some MORE to do!
So what has the 3-4+ weeks in Quarantine done to many of us workin' mommies:
1. Auto-installation of Bai2.0 skills - The moment you open your eyes in the morning, the software (re) loads itself and helps us make strategic decisions such as - Bhaandi (dishes) 1st or Jhaadoo (sweeping) 1st! Mopping too or laundry only, today!? And with these WMD - Weapons of Mass Grime & Dust Destruction, you've never felt more powerful! P.S. Let's remember to uninstall the software post April 15 i.e. whenever Big Boss decides to allow the 'Real Bai' into our homes :D
2. Auto-upgrade of Yelling 3.0 is paired with Bai2.0 - When inmates of the home, especially those younger (read less powerful) than you, trespass the vicinity just cleaned and/or undo the beautification that took you 3 hours, the software creates an involuntary, deep-throated, from-the-gut-reaction that's sure to scare the naughtiest as well as the toughest of the family members.
P.S. Research proves that it can have an impact on your neighbors and their off-springs too!
3. Auto-run of Multi-tasking 4.0 - The grace with which you switch-over from 'lead maid at home' to 'leading the team at work' is a seamless one - Seems like it's part of your DNA, after all! You realize you can stitch broken buttons when finalizing the project plan, dry your daughter's hair while continuing a girly chat with the women in the team, you can play referee to your forever-fighting-and-arguing off-springs while answering Qs during a review! And you are able to undertake relentless pursuits such as decide on hair wash for the children - Does it need to be done now, or can it be postponed till evening / tomorrow, while handling escalations over skype!
P.S. Do clarify to your team member know that the "Don't DO IT" was targeted at your son, not the current project milestone s/he must deliver in record time!
4. Continuous Integration & Constant Deployment is a Way of Life - The activities that took you 3 hours in Week 1, now takes only 2 - 2.5 hours! What you struggled with, in Week 2, is now a cake -walk! And you never knew you could do so much, so fast, and sometimes all at once. For instance, some of my friends boast they can keep track of the number of whistles from the cooker on the stove, while mopping the living room, shouting instructions to the hubby as he steps to the local grocery mart while resolving doubts on her daughters' math Qs!! Now that's like being a good Dev-Ops expert at the leading Tech Giant org, you'd agree!
P.S. Must ensure the backlog that will auto-ask the maid when she returns, "So what exactly takes you 9 am - 3 pm that we pay you full-time fee for" gets de-prioritized just in time before disaster strikes :P
5. Need for Upskilling 1.0 - Yet some of us are not certain if we remember anymore how to drive the car and/or our office addresses - While the latter will perhaps contribute to genuinely restoring back Google Maps to its original YO status when all this finally ends, the former could land us in trouble!
P.S. That reminds me, must add on my tomorrow's to-do - Go check if the car battery is alive and take her out for a spin - a spin SMALL enough so she's not seized by the super-efficient Blr cop brigade, and long enough to warm up the engine!
And when we finally reach our offices let's hope there will not be noises in our heads asking for permission to watch Boss Baby and/or decide who won the game of Table Tennis (that you barely witnessed!!!) just when you were putting your point across to your not-so-easy-to-work-with co-worker - For if we yell out, "Not now please - leave me alone", our co-worker may or may not get it, no!? :D
Thanks to #SocialDistancing i.e. #ForcedHomeArrest, you stare at your laptop or glare at the floor (or the sink!) - And there's ONLY one constant - There's some MORE to do!
So what has the 3-4+ weeks in Quarantine done to many of us workin' mommies:
1. Auto-installation of Bai2.0 skills - The moment you open your eyes in the morning, the software (re) loads itself and helps us make strategic decisions such as - Bhaandi (dishes) 1st or Jhaadoo (sweeping) 1st! Mopping too or laundry only, today!? And with these WMD - Weapons of Mass Grime & Dust Destruction, you've never felt more powerful! P.S. Let's remember to uninstall the software post April 15 i.e. whenever Big Boss decides to allow the 'Real Bai' into our homes :D
2. Auto-upgrade of Yelling 3.0 is paired with Bai2.0 - When inmates of the home, especially those younger (read less powerful) than you, trespass the vicinity just cleaned and/or undo the beautification that took you 3 hours, the software creates an involuntary, deep-throated, from-the-gut-reaction that's sure to scare the naughtiest as well as the toughest of the family members.
P.S. Research proves that it can have an impact on your neighbors and their off-springs too!
3. Auto-run of Multi-tasking 4.0 - The grace with which you switch-over from 'lead maid at home' to 'leading the team at work' is a seamless one - Seems like it's part of your DNA, after all! You realize you can stitch broken buttons when finalizing the project plan, dry your daughter's hair while continuing a girly chat with the women in the team, you can play referee to your forever-fighting-and-arguing off-springs while answering Qs during a review! And you are able to undertake relentless pursuits such as decide on hair wash for the children - Does it need to be done now, or can it be postponed till evening / tomorrow, while handling escalations over skype!
P.S. Do clarify to your team member know that the "Don't DO IT" was targeted at your son, not the current project milestone s/he must deliver in record time!
4. Continuous Integration & Constant Deployment is a Way of Life - The activities that took you 3 hours in Week 1, now takes only 2 - 2.5 hours! What you struggled with, in Week 2, is now a cake -walk! And you never knew you could do so much, so fast, and sometimes all at once. For instance, some of my friends boast they can keep track of the number of whistles from the cooker on the stove, while mopping the living room, shouting instructions to the hubby as he steps to the local grocery mart while resolving doubts on her daughters' math Qs!! Now that's like being a good Dev-Ops expert at the leading Tech Giant org, you'd agree!
P.S. Must ensure the backlog that will auto-ask the maid when she returns, "So what exactly takes you 9 am - 3 pm that we pay you full-time fee for" gets de-prioritized just in time before disaster strikes :P
5. Need for Upskilling 1.0 - Yet some of us are not certain if we remember anymore how to drive the car and/or our office addresses - While the latter will perhaps contribute to genuinely restoring back Google Maps to its original YO status when all this finally ends, the former could land us in trouble!
P.S. That reminds me, must add on my tomorrow's to-do - Go check if the car battery is alive and take her out for a spin - a spin SMALL enough so she's not seized by the super-efficient Blr cop brigade, and long enough to warm up the engine!
And when we finally reach our offices let's hope there will not be noises in our heads asking for permission to watch Boss Baby and/or decide who won the game of Table Tennis (that you barely witnessed!!!) just when you were putting your point across to your not-so-easy-to-work-with co-worker - For if we yell out, "Not now please - leave me alone", our co-worker may or may not get it, no!? :D
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